Actively waiting...

It seems like a paradox--to actively wait, doesn't it? I thought so, but it's not. There can be active waiting, and I think God is teaching me right now to do just that--wait, actively. I am trying to discern the difference between actively waiting and striving. There's a difference, I think. Because we cannot simple sit idle, expecting life and its opportunities to come to us, but at the same time, there is such futility in continually striving for the mere sake of striving, you know? It's actually exhausting. I am in a waiting period, and it's painful because I cannot see the conclusion of the "waiting," yet I know I meant to wait. However, He desires me to actively pursue Him in the midst of this waiting. I guess I'll just keep asking what's next...