The knife

Sanity is a balancing act. It is like being precariously perched on the edge of a knife. At one moment you are fine and the world is at rights with itself and you, but than the next moment, you plummet from your precarious perch into the depths of insanity. Sanity is but the width of a blade. I am amazed there are not more insane people in the world today...
I have these poignant moments in my life: when all my internal struggles are allowed to descend on my psyche like a drowning flood and cause momentary mental despair. Such is the knife analogy. Life progresses, seemingly well, and then--bam! reality, sanity is thrown into chaos. It always rights itself, usually by means of a good night's sleep, but for those moments, the knife never seems as if it will ever find equilibrium again...

The colors of the rainbow

Red

Yellow

Black
and

White

We
are

All prejudice

in each
other's

sight...

i don't know...

i don't know why i'm white
i don't know why i'm privileged

i don't know why i have food,
and others don't

i don't know why racism exists

i didn't know I was racist

i don't know why people hate

i don't know...

i don't understand poverty
i don't understand privilege

i don't know the answers to any of these burning questions...i simply don't know, but knowing begins by admitting my ignorance--that is the first step--and the rest, well, i don't know, but I will continue to ask.

Pressure

Pressure is crushing--both from within and without. Expectations surround and suffocate. I cannot escape my own failure. My strivings have come to nothing...I cannot bear these weights.

The seeking

Humanity longs for relationship. Community. Friendship. Romance. We seek to be connected to something--anything--we long to know we are not alone. The world, in its perpetual state of fragmentation, stretches out its hand to the abyss, feeling for life--for relationship. We are relational beings. And we exist in perpetual relationship with ourselves and with the world in which we find ourselves. Relationship begets relationship: two individuals produce an offspring, which grows up, mates, and produces another offspring, and the cycle continues. Humanity lives in a web of relational intricacy. Yet, we are still alone? Relationships surround, but do they fulfill? We seek, but do we find? It is like the analogy of an individual standing in the middle of a crowded room, but feeling utterly alone. Are we, as human beings, standing in the midst of community, friendship, relationship, yet remaining completely singular and alone? What have we missed...?

Fall

Grey Green the sky weeps it hues
Yellow then orange tint the pews

Laden branches dance and sway
Allowing the season to give way

To another time and space
Where life moves at apace...