Sunday, September 22, 2013

To-do:

To do list after constant do to list. Never ending cycle of accomplish this and check that off. The ceaseless marry-go-round of tasks that are forever repeating and never content: brush your teeth, shower, go get groceries, do the dishes, go to work, pay the bills, exercise. The relentless tasks of daily life. I suppose they can be viewed as relentless and tedious or joyous opportunities to experience the beautiful details of life. Depends on what kind of a day you're having I suppose.

Today, my day is one of tedium and tasks, to-do's and get-er-dones. I wish it were not always so, and it isn't-always, but all too often the tedium and dailyness of life overwhelms the possibility for beautiful moments and savored seconds of time we shall never have returned to us. Sad truth, but truth nonetheless. Tasks are tasks, to do's must get done, and showering is not optional--although flexible in its frequency. Life is relentless, period. The reality of having to brush my teeth every morning--if I'm being good--and make a lunch for myself every night won't change. So, what will? Perspective perhaps. Attitude. I suppose so, but if I'm honest--tonight, I just don't want to brush my teeth. So, sue me.

And then there's the constant nagging sense that you're behind. Say I do decide to brush my teeth--that's only one thing on a long list of "to-do's." I still have to try and wash the car, get groceries, clean the house, appease all feelings of friendship negligence via various coffee dates--and that's if I'm being productive. I won't even tangent onto the whole "productive" strain, that could take all day. And if writing becomes another to-do, I have nothing redeemable left. So, I will leave thoughts unfinished, a task undone and attempt to not feel like I've dropped the ball on life by not finishing this post...